The Man in the Ground

Theresa Malone’s very first word was NO

Said with a rage she would frequently show

18 months old she’d scowl from her seat

Slamming her hand down on food she won't eat

Theresa Malone was a furnace of rage

And this is the story of how all of that changed

In school age 6 Theresa caused up roar

When Mr.Cage and Theresa in class went to war

Theresa disliked that he smelt of stale smoke

So when he would talk she’d clutch at her throat

Mr.Cage would then keep her in during break

So Theresa watched her friends playing out by the gate

Mr Cage in class lost his temper again

As Theresa declared his nose looked like a plane

He slammed down his pens and made several kids cry

As Theresa pointed out a jet passing by

Theresa he shouted, you will be quiet as a mouse

Mr Cage, she screamed I’m going to burn down your house

This was the way for the angry young girl

Who saw red fringes lining the edge of her world

Door slams, detonations and temper eruptions

Inside or outside she was a constant disruption

But at home Theresa was silent and scared

Her father was the ogre who ruled coldly there

Theresa’s mother died when Theresa was 7

The police softly said she’d gone up to heaven

They tried to hide the unpleasant truth

Theresa’s mother another case of “domestic abuse”

But Theresa knew as her father was taken away

That she’d lost both her parents in one bitter day

Her father was tried and then sentenced to jail

His serious stern temper turning childishly pale

And Theresa was sent to an aunt out of town

Where it was hoped she would thrive and maybe calm down

Her aunt fed her apples and plenty of cake

But Theresa still shouted and threw food from her plate

For months her aunt tried every tactic she knew

But nothing would work or ever get through

And when Theresa smashed a window with an old china plate

Her aunt felt taking her in may be a mistake

Theresa, my love, I can’t cope with all this

And she dropped to her knees and hoped for a kiss

Theresa could see the pain that she’d created

But the anger in her heart could not be abated

And she stormed from her aunt there on her knees

Out to the garden and the flowers and bees

And she sat at the end over looking the fields

Trying to find the world she’d somehow concealed

She sat hunched with her knees to her chest

When she first saw the man lying at rest

He was just a mound of dirt and leaves and grass

But seeing him there made her gasp and then laugh

For though he was just dirt, grass and leaves

She could see his head and his arms and his knees

A man lying there with his arms behind his head

A man lying peaceful as though comfy in bed

The man in the ground Theresa saw laying there

The man in the ground with flowers for hair

He was just soil nothing more, just mound on the lawn

But Theresa felt certain a friendship had born

I’m angry she hissed and then started to cry

I’m angry so often and I just don’t know why

She wept by the man and the man lay un-moving

But him lying and listening was simple and soothing

So Theresa she wept and spoke of her mum and her dad

And tranquillity swift flowed and submerged all the bad

She returned inside and found her aunt in her bed

Theresa opened the door and stood and soft said

I’m sorry Aunt Josie, I’ll be better I hope

And Aunt Josie held her so perfectly tight, warm and  close

They went to the kitchen and made pastry together

And Aunt Josie had hopes that things may get better

From then Theresa would go to the garden each day

She’d fret and she’d speak her bad thoughts away

She’d let them all spill to the man in the ground

Who took them to the fires that lay deep and down

She’d go inside calmer, heart light and temper cool

And Josie would cook while they talked about school

A storm tore the night when Theresa was 9

It ripped branches from trees and laundry from lines

It shattered windows in town and broke the church spire

And it tore down reception from telegraph wires

Aunt Josie came to Theresa’s as the sky turned deep red

But found that Theresa was not in her bed

She tore through the house calling her name

Afraid of burglars, kidnappers and menace unnamed

She saw the back door was open to the night

And snatched at a torch to throw a weak light

She raced down the path towards the fields and the farm

Praying her niece was please safe from harm

She found Theresa sat with an umbrella held tight

Singing to the garden in the dark of the night

Josie stood motionless and Theresa stroked the grass

As the lightning shock crackled and thunder crashed past

I’ll keep you dry Theresa said to the ground

And laughed as the lightning flashed all around

What were you doing? Josie asked her within

As the paper quick crackled so the flames could begin

The man in the ground was washing away

Theresa replied, and that’s all she would say

So Josie made cocoa and they sat there together

The flames flickering high slow calming the weather

Theresa held her anger within now as she grew

The man in the ground the only one who now knew

She would hold her fists as she was taunted in class

About her mother and father and violence of the past

She would come home with tears and rush to the yard

Where she knew she could say all that was hard

Christmas Day, birthday or Halloween night

Theresa told the man everything that wasn’t right

Josie would watch and accept as a fact

That Theresa felt better after she’d been and done that

Theresa even wrote a letter when she was turning 13

To Mr Cage apologising for being so childishly mean

When Theresa was 16 Josie had news

That hurt like a bee sting on top of a bruise

Her father was being released in a weeks time

The courts deciding he’d been punished fow for his crime

He wanted to see her but it was entirley her choice

Did she want to see him or listen to his voice?

Theresa looked at her Aunt and blinked her tears back

As the world spun in backward and the sky turned to black

I need to speak to my friend was Theresa’s reply

And she went to the garden and sat under the sky

She told the man in the ground her father was coming

Then sat rocking quietly as the bees started humming

Theresa dug memories from deep in her mind

That there were few remaining she was saddened to find

Her mother crying and screaming No More

As her father ripped his rage and kicked at the floor

Her mother un-moving as he smashed at the walls

And Theresa age 6 and her emergency call

Now 10 years later he walked from his cell

Started walking slow towards her with feelings to tell

He wanted his daughter, he wanted to meet

Wanted to build a bridge to her heart under his feet

The man in the ground just lay under the sun

And Theresa told her aunt that her father could come

And then there he was with his eyes to the path

At her front door and Theresa wanted to laugh

Here was the man who’d watched her life begin

Asking and crying for her to let him come in

I’m so sorry he said and wrung hard at his hands

Please can I try to make you understand?

Theresa stood alone but felt something shift

Heard soil break apart and grass and dirt lift

Behind her she knew the man was stood there

One hand on her shoulder to show that he cared

The man in the ground had her back now she knew

So she said to her father what she felt was true

Dad, she said and he started to weep

As for the first time years he heard her voice speak

I forgive you she said and gave him one kiss

But that’s all I have, that’s all that there is

She shut the door and saw him through the glass

As he slow retreated back into her past

The man in the ground was laying at peace

But she saw dirt on the carpet down by her feet

The man in the ground lay under the sky

With daisies growing close to his left eye

Theresa, the girl, who was no longer a child

Saw wind move the grass so it appeared that he smiled

Theresa went to study and Aunt Josie cried

As her heart filled with hope and then filled with pride

Theresa studied hard and came home each term

And laughed and related all that she’d learnt

Then she’d go to the garden and give to the man

Small samples of soil she’d saved in a can

Dirt from her university and sand from the shore

Dirt from a pub that she liked and then more

Spoonfuls of soil from places she’d been

She scattered on the man and the grass wet and green

And the man lay at rest with his arms behind his head

Just like a man lazing on Sunday in bed

Theresa finished university and found her feet keen

To go seeking vistas and sights yet unseen

She explained to Aunt Josie that it was time to travel

To see what was out there and the future unravel

She flew to Morocco and Vietnam and Laos

Sending back postcards of where she was now

She travelled through Europe and Russia as well

Mailing back promises of stories to tell

She lived there in London and Hamburg and Spain

And criss-crossed the continent cheaply by train

She came back before Christmas in her 23^rd year

And Aunt Josie opened the door with excitement and cheer

They talked and they sipped as Theresa told tales

Of eating bugs, horse meat, intestines and snails

She showed Josie a tattoo she’d gotten in Mumbai

The date her mum was born and the date that she’d died

And then she told Aunt Josie the thing she had to say

Aunt Josie, I don’t know if you know this….I’m gay

Aunt Josie smiled and said that she knew

But I didn’t want to say anything, it was all up to you

Josie sat happy and so very proud of this girl

Who’d climbed such a mountain to be here in this world

Theresa the girl with the wild furious rages

Was now a young woman writing her pages

Theresa then sat with the man in the ground

Told him of her journeys to the humming bee sound

She pulled a tobacco tin from out of her clothes

Opened it and inhaled happily through her nose

This is the world, I’ve bought it to you

A spoonful of soil from every country she’d been through

Mud from Siem Reap near Ankor Watt

Soil from Italy where she’d briefly stopped

A scoop of America and a dash of southern Spain

A pinch of Germany near where she caught a train

A little bit of London and a wee dash of Wales

And a wet piece of Scotland dug up in a gale

Sand from the Red Centre near Uluru

All safely transported and bought back for you

A little of Russia and a touch of Nepal

She kissed each offering and watched the dirt fall

And this, she told him is from the seas I have seen

The oceans and rivers of the places I’ve been

The man in the ground lay with arms behind his head

As any man who was lazing on Sunday in bed

The dirt scattered softly and water trickled slow

Little pieces of the places that he could not go

Then Theresa lay with him and she let herself doze

And woke with a flower on top of her clothes

Aunt Josie was helping at a sausage sizzle one day

When the end of her life swift had its way

A stroke seized her mind and sent her to sleep

And she woke uncertain and unable to speak

Theresa rushed to her bed and held her good hand

Telling Josie she loved her hoping she’d understand

Aunt Josie smiled weakly and blinked one tired eye

Amazed that time had so swift passed her by

Theresa hugged her and asked her please just to stay

And in the warmth of that moment Josie passed away

Theresa wept then in that bright hospital room

Feeling her time with Aunt Josie had gone far to soon

One week later with her aunts’ final remains

Theresa sat in the garden with the man once again

This is my Aunty; she’s left the house to me,

This is where my heart is and where I will be

And she scattered the ashes right next to the man

Hoping he would keep Josie safe and warm in his hands

Theresa found love in buying vintage clothes

As she sneezed from the dust that tickled her nose

A tissue was handed from a woman named Jane

Who fell onto her heart like the softest of rain

Theresa and Jane soon shared life together

And though they couldn’t marry they promised forever

They laughed, worked, adopted and grew

Went on marches for injustice and equality too

They sat sipping wine on calm Sunday nights

While the kids they’d given homes lay lit by nightlights

Theresa lived a life shared with tears and with laughs

And visits down the garden to the man in the grass

Jane and Theresa, Theresa and Jane

Became grandparents three times and then once again

The fourth was a frowning girl named Collette

Who was bitterly angry and savagely direct

Her first word was No and the next Go Away

Theresa told the man laughing one cool winters day

She was older now with her hair wispy thin

But she had the same sparkle and the same happy grin

She laughed with the man at Collette’s latest wrath

Throwing mud at the clothes that had all just been washed

She did it because she was wearing odd socks

Pelted the sheets with mud and dirty old rocks

And as she laughed with the man Theresa felt strange

Like something in her chest had fast rearranged

Oh she said as her breathing grew still

And she sat back in her chair before she could spill

She looked back at the house where Jane gently waved

Where grandchildren were laughing at the games that they played

Am I dying? she asked of the man in the ground

But her words were impossible to bring into a sound

Her eyesight grew darker as the bees hummed close by

And Jane saw Theresa sleep instead of seeing her die

It was half hour later when Jane bought her a wine

That she found our Theresa had run out of time

But in that hour something had quietly stirred

And something impossible impossibly occurred

Theresa was sat in her chair calm at peace

Looking rested and loved not cold and deceased

In reds, blues and yellows laid with such care

Hundreds of flowers had been woven into her hair

Jane sought permission and it was allowed

To inter Theresa right there in the ground

Beside the man only Theresa could see

Under the warmth of the sun and the hum of the bee

Jane laid her to rest with joy at their life

My beloved, my best friend, my lover and wife

Then a band played old love songs and cakes were devoured

The sun sparkled through crystals and rainbows were flowered

Jane wept long and often but she laughed much as well

And when anyone asked she had stories to tell

Her children and grand children held her love dear

That even now widowed Jane was glad to be here

And a week later Collette was visiting filled with ire

Her parents tugging their hair at the girl there on fire

Collette knocked over the table and shouted out NO

And stormed outside where her Grandmother would go

Collette sat near where Gran T had been lain

And shouted in frustration and fury again

Collette was 5 and possessed of such aggression

That instead of soft toys rage was her possession

But there in the garden Collette found she could see

Her grandmother, Aunt Josie - and he

A man lying resting with his arms under his head

Just like a man lazing on Sunday in bed

Her grandmother Theresa placed one hand to her lips

Then winked at Collette and blew her a kiss

The man smiled broadly and Collette felt safe from harm

And knew that speaking would help her feel calm

So she stumbled and uttered her words in a rush

As Theresa nodded and then said to her Hush

Any time you are raging or torn up inside

Come visit us here with nothing to hide

Send your fury down into the lava below

Let it warm up the world and help the trees grow

We are here my love, any time you need speak

At the end of the garden, just come here and seek

And at the end of the garden outside of the home

Where Jane still lives warmly, well loved but alone

Theresa, Aunt Josie and the Man in the Ground

Hear the world ageing and every soft sound

Collette comes to them often and her rage slips away

And they lay there together at peace at the ebb of the day